1.
At one of the resorts abroad, to which I was invited, one of the guests returned to the hotel, after a tiring day's hike, injured and limping in his leg.
It turned out that he was the first to volunteer to jump from a height of two meters onto a spring mattress that was placed on the bottom.
The mattress was supposed to be inflated and bounce the man high, but unfortunately it turned out that the mattress was probably not inflated enough, which caused him to jump on the mattress and break his legs.
Since no one declared the place he had ended up in safe, he had no one to complain to, but himself. And that's what the man did, and throughout the rest of his vacation he remained bruised and miserable.
The most annoying thing that happens to people is that they have no one to complain to. No one to come and complain, no one to come and visit.
See the victims of traffic accidents, who fell asleep on the road or illegally overtook the vehicle in front of them and caused the accident.
They return home beaten and bruised and have no one to shout, scream, complain or protest at, except themselves, which is really not enough.
This is why sometimes people who are hurt look underground for someone to complain to. When we complain, grumble, point angrily, and lash out – we are taking out a little of our anger. We take our anger out on others and thus calm ourselves.
2.
You can see the woman walking through the supermarket with a shopping cart and trampling the foot of someone walking in front of her. The man turns around, and instead of trying to soothe his aching foot, he starts yelling at the woman:
""Can't you see how you're going?""
No. She didn't see. She didn't know at all what he wanted from her, but he took out some of the pain by shouting at the woman.
See the father whose child dragged a chair to put at the table and accidentally got stuck in it. "Can’t you be careful?" he roars at the child who just wanted to help and doesn’t understand what the commotion is about.
3.
They tell of two people who lay in the hospital bed next to each other. One was injured in an accident, which he himself was to blame for. The other was injured in an attack.
The condition of the person injured in the attack was worse than the man who had an accident.
""I envy you," the man blurted out from the accident.
""Jealous? And isn't your situation better than mine!""
""Yes, but you have someone to complain to and I don't.".
Sighing and screaming are apparently helpful for some people. It is a fact that a woman suffering in labor would rather scream out loud the cry of pain than stifle the scream. Just getting the cry out from within helps somewhat.
But for the most part, a person doesn't usually yell at themselves.
4.
There is probably a difference from case to case.
Last week, on my radio show, I interviewed Adva Biton, the mother of Adel, who spoke about the empire she is doing for her daughter, who was murdered in the attack. This is an example of shouting in her place.
This is an example of a case where the sound of shouting is the sound of construction – people who took their grief and, with a loud voice, turned it into a world building.
On the other hand, just the other day I saw a boy on the street who wanted to cross the road, in the place where crossing is allowed. When a car quickly appeared, he turned back, without noticing an older man who was walking right there.
The man received a small blow, not at all unpleasant, but he attacked the boy in a way I wouldn't attack my enemy.
Yes, there are cases in which shouting is beneficial and creates prosperous buildings, and there are cases in which shouting, while making things easier for us, sabotages our relationships with our colleagues, causes a deep scar on others, or shames innocent people.
Maybe it's time to examine our cries. Are they true cries or are they false cries?
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