I have a solution to the Israeli-Tel Aviv conflict: two states for two peoples.
Yes, Tel Aviv must be recognized as an independent state. It has a beach, an airport, and towers. What more do you need? This will be a secular, liberal state, a state of all its citizens.
Think about it: Finally, a left-wing government will be formed, headed by Bozhi Herzog, who in an emergency will prove his battle strategy and... go to bed.
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Tzipi Livni will continue to raise cocktails around the world for peace with the residents of 'Tel Sudan' in south Tel Aviv - and Meretz will fulfill her dream: everything will be free, everything will be permitted. Eliminate the order of religious coercion.
In the state of Tel Aviv, everyone will marry everyone else, buses will run on Shabbat, there will be chametz for everyone on Passover, and pork steak on Yom Kippur.
dream.
Tourists will even start arriving from Berlin!
We will not interfere with their public transportation in their neighborhoods, and they will not interfere with the Mehadrin lines that run in our neighborhoods; we will not publicly impose on them the customs of the Jews on Passover and Tisha B'Av, and they will not impose on us the customs of the Gentiles on the days of remembrance.
Everything will fall into place peacefully.
Every morning there will be a walk to the coffee shop with the puppy, and the only thing they can grumble about in the state of Tel Aviv is the espresso that arrives late.
They will no longer be interested in the fate of the neighboring country.
All the pathetic right-wingers, those who bring poverty and ignorance upon themselves, didn't learn their lesson and elected Bibi again. So let them suffocate, and their chocolate videos.
But, wait. Does this mean that Anat Waxman will have to work hard in the theater to get an item? Yair Garbuz will only appear in the literature section? And the renowned professor 'Pahtseroni' will return to his obscurity? And how will the residents of the state of Tel Aviv actually feel that they are worth something, if they have no one to look up to?
Wait, this is also a huge economic loss. Dozens of nonprofits will close. What will Shahar Ilan do without Hiddush? What will occupy the activists of 'Free Israel' if everything is allowed?
And Lapid... what else can he sell? Leave it alone... there's no way that's going to happen.
When is the flight to Berlin?
