A year, two, and three years ago we stood in the same place. We gathered in the silence of the night to say our prayers. We asked, we promised, we declared the opening of a new page. And here we are again, with the same responses, the same falls, the same meager summary of an entire year.
Once again, we stand before the Lord of the worlds with bowed heads and trembling hearts and declare: "Neither by grace nor by deeds have we come before you; as poor and needy, we have knocked on your doors." Each of us says to God, "I am before you as a vessel filled with shame and reproach.".
And don't we have any shame in coming and asking for forgiveness and pardon again?
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Many forgive.
Indeed, the feeling of shame and guilt is natural and healthy. Anyone who does not feel this way probably does not attach true importance to the occasion of forgiveness and does not consider the words that come out of his mouth. Anyone who seriously reflects on standing before the Creator of the world, and on what he did and did not do in the past year, knows very well how much he must ask for forgiveness and pardon. But what is the point of going back and asking for forgiveness again and again for the same things for which we asked for forgiveness in the past years?
Hasidic teachings explain that this is where God differs from humans: if a person is hurt once and forgives, and then is hurt again, he will find it difficult to forgive a second time. Of course, he will be honored to forgive a third and fourth time. It is reasonable to assume that at a certain point he will refuse to forgive any longer and will tell the person seeking forgiveness to stop blaming him, since by his behavior he proves that he does not have serious intentions.
In contrast, God is willing to forgive us again and again and again. Since He is infinite, His measure of forgiveness and pardon is also infinite. He is willing to forgive once, twice, three, and four times – ad infinitum. If we only come to Him with a whole heart, with true repentance and complete repentance – He will forgive and pardon.
We must be ashamed; we must feel remorse for the decisions we did not uphold; but we must not despair. Even someone who has failed for eighty years can turn a new leaf, correct his actions, and be entitled to complete forgiveness and pardon from God, who is "great in forgiving.".
The secret of forgiveness
The Sages say that the secret of forgiveness was revealed to King David: "King David knew that the Temple would be destroyed, and the sacrifices would be useless... and David was sorry for Israel, how would their sins be atoned for. The Blessed One said to him... They will stand before Me in one assembly and confess their sins, and they will recite before Me the order of forgiveness, and I will answer them.".
The Blessed One taught Moses the thirteen virtues of mercy after the Israelites sinned with the calf, as the Torah relates: "And the Lord passed by and proclaimed, 'The Lord, the Lord, the God of mercy, merciful and gracious,' etc." The Talmud cites a wonderful statement by Rabbi Yochanan: "If it were not for a written command, it would be impossible for them to say it. It teaches that the Blessed One took the form of a public messenger, and showed Moses a prayer order. He said to him: 'As long as the Israelites sin, they will do before me according to this order, and I will forgive them.'".
This is the special power of saying Selichot, thanks to which God, the Blessed One, forgives us for all our sins and grants us a new year. Therefore, these are special days of grace and mercy, and it is worth taking advantage of them to purify ourselves and draw closer to our Father in Heaven.
