Five months and one week. This is exactly the amount of time it took my friend N. to realize he was addicted.
On Rosh Chodesh Cheshvan this year, he received a special gift. His dear father-in-law purchased a variety of "happy" devices for him and the entire extended family, as an act of reinforcement and good reception after the High Holidays.
'We said 'happy', not 'kosher'.
For some of the family, it was certainly a significant strengthening, since the transition from "Father of the Forefathers of Impurity" to "Father of Impurity" is definitely defined as the beginning of a journey. However, for the pure groom, Avrech ben Avrech, who until now had been carrying a small, kosher device, the move was cruel and dangerous.
He couldn't find a good reason to object to the free upgrade, since a stylish kosher seal from the 'Rabbial Committee for My Affairs' was stamped on the new devices, large and prominent, "and if they allow it, then he won't be more righteous than them." And in general, he didn't want to be the 'nephew' on duty who would ruin everyone's big celebration of strengthening, which was accompanied by a lot of noise and ringing. Yes, literally.
His "justified" wife, who had already tasted the taste of life by being consumed by the "work-related" drive with great approval (probably), immediately began the much-needed work of informing and assisting those who still belonged to the outdated generation of buttons, and knew touch screens only from the bank's cash register.
""Now I won't have to interrupt you in the middle of the kollel on the phones," the woman cheered. "From now on, we'll correspond on WhatsApp like two normal people. It'll save us time and unnecessary talk.".
Indeed, within minutes the disciplined husband learned all the sections and subsections of the icons, smileys, emoticons, and emojis that belong to the virtual world, and God forgive me if I forgot a few more wonderful names.
At a large banquet, the dear groom was finally added to the family WhatsApp group as a full member, and his status in the group - as the spiritual figure - even brought a real smile to his face.
The owner of the house, who felt, and rightly so, delighted by the joy, also began to explain to his son-in-law how much the wonderful gift would benefit him from now on and how the blessed applications would save him money and time - which he could devote to additional work in Torah. Ahhh... what a love of Torah!
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The truth is, no one in the community knew about the change that had occurred in N's life.
In the early days, one could still see his joy on his face and his usual joy in life, despite all the hardships and good fortune. Only those with keen eyes could notice that the constant Abraach's outings in the middle of the Seder were more frequent and forced.
The reason was simple: N. the righteous man was completely afraid of desecrating the name and preferred to avoid a situation in which he would have to explain to any of his friends and acquaintances that the device was truly kosher and only 'appeared' to be a prey.
Just about a week after the start of 'Bein Zhamin Nissan' he contacted me. He was broken, devastated and depressed.
""Save me!" he said. "I'm addicted.".
For the first few minutes, it seemed to me that my ears were deceiving me.
N. is a benefactor literally and figuratively. From morning until night he engages in Torah and Halacha. He even sets aside times to listen to moral talks, and he also attends the Beit Midrash on Fridays and Saturday evenings (yes, there is such a thing, it's worth checking out), and his spiritual time is truly precious.
Only when I asked again and again did I realize how far I, who am still somehow involved in the field, am from understanding the crazy powers projected under the auspices of Satan.
That day I realized that you don't have to fall into fornication to be addicted. That day I realized that you don't have to be a Sabbath desecrator to be distant.
You can simply be a precious and pure righteous man, with malignant cancer in your left pants pocket.
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The virtual world sucked into it with indescribable and indescribable powers the soul of N., who felt that he lived in a completely different world and spoke a completely different language. The real, living, breathing environment was abhorrent to him. He was disgusted and fed up with other people around him; they were one big nuisance to him.
His real life was on the 'happy' device and his two thumbs were worth much more to him than his heart and lungs.
By the grace of God and through his own efforts, the young man moved into the real world. The beginning was actually easy, the difficulty came at night when he got up on his feet and his fingers, as if in a robotic movement, sought the touch of their lives. With tremendous mental strength, N. managed to distract himself and engage in real, tangible things.
Today he is both a blessing and a response.