My Ephraim, sweet child,
Now you're sleeping in bed, well covered after a shower...I'm sitting next to you and crying, and with the tears, thoughts come to me.
Tomorrow you will wake up and this will be the first time your charming childlike innocence will be cracked.
I will remind you that yesterday afternoon I asked you what your dream was? And you answered that the three kidnapped people would be found. And I smiled at you. I know how much you pray for their return both at home and in Talmud Torah. And like any child your age, it is clear to you that every dream will eventually come true and every prayer will surely be answered exactly as we want.
And here it is, for the first time and very tangible, that you will understand that things can end differently... and hopes so strong that you can really feel them, sometimes shattered. Tomorrow we will talk and I will try to explain to you what I understood, I am at a slightly older age than you.
I will try to explain to you that God sits in heaven, and He only wants what is good for us, even if we can't quite understand what is good about it... This will be the first lesson in faith, a lesson that even I, your mother, have not finished learning... a lesson that lasts a lifetime...
I'll tell you what my mother told me: that when a mother takes her baby to get vaccinated, he cries, and he doesn't understand why mother is causing him pain, and mother cries with him. But she knows that she is only doing him good, and she understands the crying, and she understands that he doesn't understand.
And I will hug you tightly and hope that you manage to understand even a little bit and absorb this difficult lesson. After I feel you close to me, I will say out loud thank you to the Lord of the Universe for the treasures of a healthy and complete life that He has given me, and I will ask, I will beg Him to continue to protect them for me, and not to test us with such difficult trials, and enough, to bring redemption, because it is no longer possible...
My Ephraim, today you are 6 years old and tomorrow you will be 6 years old too, but a 6-year-old is more mature and believes more.
And now I'm going to bed to cry a little...
And pray.
mother.