{"id":18184,"date":"2014-05-12T18:56:56","date_gmt":"2014-05-12T15:56:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ch10.co.il\/?p=18184"},"modified":"2025-08-06T22:33:49","modified_gmt":"2025-08-06T19:33:49","slug":"%d7%90%d7%a0%d7%99-%d7%9e%d7%aa%d7%97%d7%a0%d7%9f-%d7%9c%d7%94-%d7%a9%d7%99%d7%a7%d7%97-%d7%90%d7%95%d7%aa%d7%99-%d7%9e%d7%9b%d7%aa%d7%91%d7%95-%d7%94%d7%a7%d7%a9%d7%94-%d7%a9%d7%9c-%d7%a0","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ch10.co.il\/en\/news\/18184\/","title":{"rendered":"\""I beg God to take me" \u2022 The harsh letter of a teenage dropout"},"content":{"rendered":"

It is not easy to work with dropout youth. The difficult cases encountered by those engaged in the profession require tremendous mental strength in dealing with particularly complex educational and psychological challenges. Anyone who has dealt even a little with this sensitive and Sisyphean field knows what I am talking about.<\/p>\r\n

This week I received a letter written by a boy to his classmates after he dropped out of the educational system. In the letter, he recounts the particularly severe abuse he endured at the hands of his classmates - physical and mental abuse, which led him to drop out of the educational system and the spiritual framework.<\/p>\r\n

I read it and cried.<\/p>\r\n

I immediately thought about my child, his class, and the friends he had, and I realized how important parental involvement is in a child's life, and how cruel the world of children is sometimes than we think.<\/p>\r\n

This letter will shock some readers. It may sound exaggerated to some of you, but after checking the details with my fellow cult members, I can confirm the details of the incidents mentioned in the letter. The members claimed that they thought it was just "a game. We didn't know he was taking it so seriously.".<\/p>\r\n

I decided to transcribe and publish the letter (except for identifying details), to expose educators, parents, and students to the introverted world of the 'rejected' child, a gifted and talented boy living in a world of alienation and abuse. With a little more attention from educators, and a little more parental involvement, it would be possible to prevent the next dropout.<\/p>\r\n

\u00a0\""They're lynching me like a sect"'<\/strong><\/p>\r\n

Below is the letter:<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Hello "friends".<\/span><\/p>\r\n

In recent years, during our shared studies, around 7th-8th grade, the phrase "Haim (fictitious) Monday Haim Walder" was common.'<\/p>\r\n

You mocked, you laughed as if at the connection between me and Haim Walder, you didn't believe it, and when you said that, I asked myself if it wasn't because of you that the connection between me and Haim Walder began? But let's not rush things.<\/p>\r\n

This week, Yitzhak (a pseudonym) called me and asked me if I wanted to come to a joint class party, etc. I told him yes. After about two days, I remembered this conversation and began to reflect on the past, on the memories I have of him, on the difficulties I went through with him.<\/p>\r\n

I'll go back 11.5 years so you can understand what I'm talking about.<\/p>\r\n

I started kindergarten on the 1st of Elul as a small child and like any other small child taking his first steps in the social and academic fields, a year later at the age of four I was transferred to the "*********" school, not imagining the life that was going to be mine there.<\/p>\r\n

Another year passes, during which I grow up and become a disciplined child, a good and standard child, another year, first grade, during which I acquired the theory of writing, and so on, a tremendous writing talent is revealed in me that can be put into practice, an IQ test that was given to me revealed that I am a gifted child and without boasting that on an intellectual level I am several levels above everyone else, second grade arrives and then the great transformation occurs, I do not know what caused this, but one thing I do know, my life became hell, humiliation, insults, non-participation in games, beatings, fights, curses, negative stigmas were attached to me and I, a good child who never touched a fly, was thrown into a turbulent world full of intrigues and plots. Here are some simple examples of what happened:<\/p>\r\n

For example, two children take something, hide it in my bag, ask where it is, and then direct their search to me and find it with me, lynching me like a cult.<\/p>\r\n

\u00a0\""I beg God to take me"'<\/strong><\/p>\r\n

Another example: a child passes by, gives me a kiss and continues on as if nothing happened. When I ask him what I did to him, he ignores me, and in my most innocent way, I don't dare tell the teacher or the parents.<\/p>\r\n

Six months pass, for those who remember in the middle of second grade, the school was transferred to ******** a few meters from my house and that's where it became even more terrible. They would chase me all the way to my house and throw stones at me. I wet my pillow at night and ask God to stop this abuse, which was both physical and mental, or alternatively, to kill me and that way I wouldn't have to suffer at all.<\/p>\r\n

As a reminder, I was just a seven-year-old boy in second grade who had trouble falling on his head.<\/p>\r\n

Another year passes, the abuse multiplies many times over, my soul is broken, I beg God to take me, to kill me, more trouble is being caused to me and my life is not living, at first I still kept my head above water, but then an incident occurred that completely destroyed me:<\/p>\r\n

It was with Rabbi ******* Shlita, there was a class where I made an effort to know, where I made an effort to study and I got some candy, no matter how childish it may sound, but looking back it was important to me, one of the guys came up to me and said, 'Haim, give me the candy' I told him I didn't want it and that was it, then he told me if you give me the candy I will protect you from someone who wants to hit you, even though it was hard for me I agreed because I thought it would be worth it, I gave it to him, and then during that break someone came up to me and wanted to hit me, I ran to him and he looked at me, spat on me and gave me a slap and said just because you gave me the candy I won't hit you too and gave me to someone who wanted to hit me.<\/p>\r\n

It broke my heart, and here I was in the second academic level, where I was a rising star and, according to everyone's predictions, my future, I became a falling star, suddenly getting low grades on tests, not studying in class, being rude, cursing, etc.<\/p>\r\n

\""Another year of endless wickedness"\"<\/strong><\/p>\r\n

The teachers, who were used to a different class, saw this as my fault and did not come to my aid in any area, and when my parents saw this, they punished me and so on. I was thus defeated in every way. Meanwhile, another year passed in which I turned from a bright child into a failed child, another year of endless wickedness, of crying and abuse, and then came a period that could have continued forever, a period in which they turned me into a dog, a period in which I became a servant and a slave whose cries of "land, land" were pushed into every hole, until Rabbi ******** caught on and stopped it immediately, and so another year passed and another, with each one breaking down more and more, and the worst part was that I could not even inform on the rabbis because when I would inform, I would immediately become a stinker and an informer, and that's how life rolled on and on.<\/p>\r\n

At the end of the sixth grade, beginning of the seventh grade, a connection was formed between me and Haim Walder and he supported me emotionally. In the seventh grade, I broke down completely and began to deteriorate spiritually. I became completely secular, Galaxy, friends, jeans, girlfriends, Facebook, etc., the mall became a daily bread for me, and by the end of the eighth grade, I was already completely secular. I just needed to tell my parents and move to the next year's Mekif Y, which I had already registered for and was accepted to. I stopped praying and putting on tefillin. I would watch movies all day and on and on, I would bathe in mixed beaches, and so on.<\/p>\r\n

\""You murdered me and finished me off."\"<\/strong><\/p>\r\n

In an instant, I had a transformation and signed up for a good yeshiva, but even there, my relationships with my friends were bad until they gently suggested I look for another setting. This is what Haim Walder explained to me: when a person sees his friends as harmful, he stops believing in them and they return the favor by alienating him.<\/p>\r\n

Today I study at the ******* yeshiva (for those who have returned to repentance) and I am spiritually regressing. All the great spiritual ascent I had has faded away. I no longer wear a hat and suit, and I am barely black and white there. So if one day you hear that Chaim has become a criminal, don't say, "Our hands did not shed this blood!"\"<\/p>\r\n

Because you murdered me and finished me off, and for that I do not forgive and am unable to forgive!<\/p>\r\n

And when you are in a good yeshiva, I am thrown somewhere and spiritually deteriorate greatly.<\/p>\r\n

Hello and no goodbye..... The seal with a tear...... N.Y.<\/p>\r\n

\u2022\u00a0Benyahu Yom Tov is the chairman of the Tetharut movement and the coordinator of the Haredi sector at the Drug and Alcohol Control Authority.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\r\n

\"\u05e1\u05e8\u05d9\u05e7\u05d4\"<\/a><\/p>\r\n

\"\u05e1\u05e8\u05d9\u05e7\u05d40001\"<\/a><\/p>\r\n

\"\u05e1\u05e8\u05d9\u05e7\u05d40002\"<\/a><\/p>\r\n

\"\u05e1\u05e8\u05d9\u05e7\u05d40003\"<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Chaim was a gifted boy who was abused by his friends, which culminated in him becoming a 'human dog' \u2022 He made contact with Rabbi Chaim Walder, but the journey to the street was inevitable \u2022 Now, in a chilling letter, he recounts what he went through: "If the rumor comes that I have become a criminal, do not say our hands did not shed the blood. You murdered me"'","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[138],"tags":[3295,3290,1000,3289,3288],"class_list":["post-18184","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-138","tag-3295","tag-3290","tag-1000","tag-3289","tag-3288"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n"\u05d0\u05e0\u05d9 \u05de\u05ea\u05d7\u05e0\u05df \u05dc\u05d4' \u05e9\u05d9\u05e7\u05d7 \u05d0\u05d5\u05ea\u05d9" \u2022 \u05de\u05db\u05ea\u05d1\u05d5 \u05d4\u05e7\u05e9\u05d4 \u05e9\u05dc \u05e0\u05e2\u05e8 \u05e0\u05d5\u05e9\u05e8 - \u05d7\u05e8\u05d3\u05d9\u05dd10<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/ch10.co.il\/en\/news\/18184\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\""\u05d0\u05e0\u05d9 \u05de\u05ea\u05d7\u05e0\u05df \u05dc\u05d4' \u05e9\u05d9\u05e7\u05d7 \u05d0\u05d5\u05ea\u05d9" \u2022 \u05de\u05db\u05ea\u05d1\u05d5 \u05d4\u05e7\u05e9\u05d4 \u05e9\u05dc \u05e0\u05e2\u05e8 \u05e0\u05d5\u05e9\u05e8 - 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